The 12 Queer Sex Spots Of Xmas | Autostraddle

all illustrations by
Archie Bongiovanni

Christmas time is cumming! That is correct — child J’s birthday is no longer about virgin births or cancelled routes or explaining the merits of veganism your dull eather uncle. It is more about jumping in the sack with somebody (or three) and participating in some virtuous, old fashioned offering and obtaining. Take to these opportunities to provide some spice (ooh, is the fact that nutmeg?) your sexual life this December. The holigays are queer!

1. The “Elf About Rack”

One cutie perches throughout the edge of a table. Bae kneels below them and services the cutie along with their lips. Cutie informs bae they are naughty this current year (or good, based on the things they desire hear).

2. The “Fistmas Cheer”

Two audacious queers sit dealing with each other. They fist one another making use of their generously-lubricated proper hands while concurrently consuming eggnog (or a dairy-free alternative) employing left fingers.

3. The “Gay Clothing”

If you’re in a cold weather, you recognize the task of getting sex while remaining comfortable. As soon as the weather exterior is actually frightful, you and your sweetie can snuggle in to the exact same jacket and feel both upwards.

4. The “Reverse Reindeer”

Mate #1 lies flat to their back. Partner # 2 deals with from them and straddles their unique sides. Mate # 1 holds lover number 2’s hair while they bump and grind. Optional: lover #1 shouts, “Merry Christmas time to any or all and to all an effective evening!”

5. The “Five Golden G-Strings”

Five or more hotties in lean underwear sit-in a range while tilting against each other. They at the same time achieve to the sexpot in front of them, pull their unique underpants to the side and do hand gender of any kind on every various other. Every 10 minutes, the caboose gets to go on to the front to allow them to have a jolly blast, as well.

6. The “Tits the Season”

One well-endowed hottie hovers their own bosom over an eager cutie’s chest. They brush their own nipples together until they at the same time climax.

7. “The Christmas Time


One recherche femme pour faire l’amour returns another femme’s gloves.

8. The “Stocking Stuffer”

A professional, lubricated deviant will get to their hands and knees while a skilled dom with adequately-trimmed toenails foots their unique ass. For a supplementary merry ground, decide to try
Swiss Navy’s butt lube
, containing clove oil and smells the same as a vacation Yankee candle.

9. The “Shopping Mall Santa”

A prominent queer straps on a large, yellow dildo and sits in a tough chair. One admirer straddles the dong and requires it for a long, difficult sleigh drive while different suitors impatiently wait their particular turns.

10. The “Shag the Halls”

This option fades on the unmarried people who wish fa-la-la-la-la themselves into the getaway nature. Place a suction glass vibrator from the wall in a narrow hall. Brace yourself resistant to the face-to-face wall surface whilst you ram that vibrator your chimney and relish the autonomy of singlehood.

11. The “Figgy Pudding”

Companion # 1 rests on lover # 2’s face and grinds until they squirt into spouse no. 2’s hungry throat and also have a happy new-year.

12. The “Cum All Ye Loyal”

Multiple queers pile their parts onto
a Magic Wand
throughout the highest setting.

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